Our Manner

Our Manner is an Expression or Sign of Our State of Mind

The lack of good manners demonstrated on the Osaka transportation system has been a well known fact for a long time, but recently Tokyo has also started showing the same signs.

People cross the roads regardless of the crosswalks or pedestrians crossings. Some people do use the crosswalks, but often when the signal is red, if they see no car coming. Sometimes parents cross in crosswalks with their young children, but also against a red light. It worries me to think what kind of adults these children might grow up to be if they are being shown these kinds of examples now.

Just as good manners are lacking in the younger generation, poor traffic manners are also lacking in the elderly generation. This seems to show that there is no relation to the age of the person when it comes to bad manners.

There are many reasons and causes that contribute to bad manners. One of the main reasons is “not being able to wait” (being impatient.) This is a reflection of us being very self-centered or selfish, as we are only thinking of ourselves. Of course there may be situations that require that we move quickly, but many people often rush without any reason, just out of habit.

“Our state of mind” is usually reflected “in the state our body portrays”. Therefore it is possible to know the state of one’s mind through the actions of the body. The action of being impatient “in a hurry” shows us that our mind is actually disturbed and not calm.

When we are impatient and “not able to wait”, we tend to make a faulty decisions. This will also lead us to make unnecessarily careless mistakes in daily life. If you are a leader or an instructor, a person who is in a position to lead staff or students, it is necessary to notice your state of mind from your own actions every day.

Not being able to listen to others talking and cutting in on the conversation, rushing into the train at the last minute, or urgently pressing the close button for the elevator door, this is all essentially the same thing. What do you all think?

In addition to “not being able to wait”, this often comes together with being “irresponsible” and “inattentive”.

I have often seen pedestrians with earphones in their ears crossing the street without checking whether any cars are coming or not. It seems like they are leaving their own personal safety in the hands of others. Also some people start crossing the road irresponsibly even when they see a car coming. This is because they think “the car must and will stop for me”.

Not only pedestrians are irresponsible in their manner, but also drivers. There are many drivers that are irresponsible and careless. Especially careless are the drivers that talk on the phone or send mail on their smart phones while driving. These actions cause us to be unable to see clearly the situation on the road, as well as pedestrians that are crossing the streets. We should not leave our own safety in the hands of others.

Even the behavior of crossing the street is a reflection of our mind. By being aware of each action, it is possible to train the mind to be calm. Especially during bad weather or when a part of a large crowd, there are many pedestrians who are not able to keep their awareness and attention on others.

To calm one’s mind before going out is an important training.

I practice this every day.